Jack and Ruchi

I wanted to ask her something for a long time. But the moment never came up. Today, I decided, would be the day. “How you’ve been?” I asked Ruchi, as I waited for her in the only hallway of our high school. Her head turned to the direction of my voice, her lips curled into a soft smile, as she made her way towards me. “I need your help Jack” she said, walking up to me. She reached out and brushed against my forearm. I, like a gentleman, offered it to her. “M’lady” I fake bowed, even though she couldn’t see it. But she felt it, and, as expected, hit me on my head, laughing. “Stop it. I’m serious. I need you to dictate me today’s biology notes. Also kinda explain it?” “Sure thing Ruchi. Meet you at the usual in 5?” ” Okay, don’t be late.” 

I found Ruchi at our usual, that is, at the school cafeteria. Not the new one. There is still a few benches left out of the old abandoned one, paint peeling, the plastic cracked. We mostly hung out there, studying, talking, whatever. She was tapping her stick against the benches. Her head perked up as soon as she heard me. “You’re late” she said “So hang me, I got delayed. Traffic. You get it right?” “Yeah right, shut up. Let’s start.” 

“So that’s how the human ear works.” I finished after half an hour. “You were right, that is simple.” She said excitedly. “I’m sorry I kept you back all this time Jack. But I just don’t understand biology” she sighed, running her fingers over the notes she made nervously. I gently lifted her hand and placed it on mine, rubbing circles, trying to calm her down “Hush! It’s okay. You just have problem in picturising stuff.” “Yeah, duh! After this year, I’ll opt for literature, and not this whole science mess. Its a crime!” ” Hey!” “Sorry,”she laughed. ” I know you love science, but I don’t. So let me curse it while I have my voice.” She let go of my hand, and started to pack.

“Yeah, about that, Ruchi, do you have anywhere to go?” “My mom called before, you came. I told him I was with you. She said okay. She seems to trust you.” “That’s a relief. I was thinking you mom might start interrogating me, CIA-style.” “Yeah, we even have a black SUV” she joked. “You’ll be walking alone in the dark when the SUV will swerve in front of you and my brother and my mom will leap out and inject you with–with, ” “Anaesthesia?” I offered. “Yeah with that. Anastasia” “It’s pronounced anaesthesia” I repeated. “Here, let me write it for you.” I took her special pen and wrote in her notebook. She ran her fingers over it, lips moving silently. “Anastasia.” She read out loud. “Oh for god sake!” I burst out laughing. She threw the notebook at me, laughing. “Shut up”

“So Ruchi, basically I’m like your best friend right?” “Alas its such a great tragedy” she mimicked Shakespearean actors. “But seriously, yeah, I feel grateful to god that you found me” “Or I found you. And we have so much in common. So, I guess I can tell you what I wanted to tell you for so long.” “Stop with the dramatics” she said, leaning forward, cupping her cheeks with the palms of her hand. “Whats the matter Jack?” “Well Ruchi, I guess what I wanted to tell you is, well” I laughed nervously.”Ruchi, I love you!” I could see her face change. “Oh!” She looked shaken “That’s unexpected” she hid her face in her hands. “Look Ruchi, I swear I love you” I was panicking now. ”And its not a teenage attraction or anything. And I promise– wait Ruchi, are you crying?!” I could hear her muffled sob.

“Oh Jack, can’t you see me and tell?” “Of course I can” “But I can’t. Since I was born, I couldn’t see. I was always treated differently. With pity! My parents were understanding, so was my brother. They always helped me and made me feel normal. But that was in my home. Outside, I was another blind person. I don’t even know how to explain it to you.” “I understand Ruchi” “Do you Jack? Do you understand the fact every step can lead to my death?” I had to admit, she got me there. I had no idea how it was, actually being her. “Do you understand how many times people– never mind. Look Jack, I have no social life, unlike you. I don’t have friends, except you. I never had birthday parties. Hell, I don’t even have a Facebook. And I can’t recall how many times exactly, I’ve been bullied at school because of my, my, my problem. I was always an outsider. But you, Jack, you make me feel like I belong somewhere. You are the only person who made me feel at home, or at least safe, outside home. You make me feel, for the moment, normal. That’s why my parents agreed when I told them you’d come to pick me up.”

“Well, your mom is wonderful” “She is. She understands a lot. About you. Maybe it was your behaviour, your voice, something.” “Wow, I’m that special huh?” I joked, trying to make her laugh. She did. ” Stop joking” she said, playfully hitting me. “Look Jack, the thing is, you honestly are a blessing to me, but you can have other girls, who, who, who don’t, you know. Who can see you. Look at you. Who aren’t broken as me. And I don’t know, honestly, why you even approached me three years ago.” “First of all, I don’t need someone to see me. I need you to see my soul.” “Yeah, that was more cheesy than that cheeseburst we had on your birthday” she laughed. “stop trying to make me laugh, I’ll forget what I was gonna say! .” “Okay okay sorry. Please go on”

 “Secondly you looked lonely. And I went through the same phase when I first came here. No one to talk to. Strangers all around. And I didn’t want you to go through the same phase. I know how much it sucks. Then we got talking, and I realized you are much more. And I wanted to know you better, and now here we are, me on my knees, holding out my heart. What do you say?” I looked at her, hopefully. “Are you really kneeling?” She laughed. “I meant it metaphorically, come on!” She looked down “Love.” she said longingly “I never thought someone like me would- ” she looked up. “What if you break my heart? What if you decide one day I’m not good enough? That you want someone who can see you?” 

It was at this moment I realized. Ruchi was in love with me too. Fine, call me stupid, but I honestly didn’t knew. And here I was scared about rejection. I took her hand, intertwining our fingers. “Ruchi, just give me a chance.” “Jack, I love you Jack, I do” she said, turning her palm to meet mine. “what if we don’t work out?” She laced her fingers with mine, entangling them. “Look I can joke and laugh like a normal girl, but at the end of the day, I only do that with you. At the end of the day, I’m just a scared blind girl in love with a boy who I never hoped would me mine, who is more than just a crush. A real friend. What if we breakup? I can’t afford to lose the only friend I have. And your a…. Oh Jack ?”

I stood up. “Look Ruchi, I get it. You’re scared. You’re scared of love, of what it possibly means and of the fallout. But I promise you, I’m going to make you believe in love.” “What do you mean?” She looked confused. “You like me right?” She nodded. “And I like you. Very much. But no I’m not gonna ask you to be my girlfriend!” Ruchi looked confused. “What do you mean?”

“I mean, I’m going to support you. I’m going to be your friend, just like how we are right now. You’re scared I’ll leave. I won’t. I’ll be your friend, even if it means not being in a relationship. I don’t care about some dumb boyfriend-girlfriend tag, all I care about is you. And if it means waiting for you to be ready, even if takes years, I’ll–” Ruchi stopped me, pressing her lips against mine.

Except, she missed by an inch, so she was kissing my cheek, her palm pressed against my lips. “Umm I really messed up right?” Ruchi asked nervously, after she pulled away. I laughed. “Depends. But why? I thought you didn’t want this between us?” “I don’t know, I couldn’t stop myself” She started speaking fast. “I felt it was the right thing to do. All my life, I took every step with caution, didn’t allow myself to enjoy the things others take for granted. For once, I want to really take a step blindly” “Terrible pun” “I know, unintended. But yes. I want to take this leap blindly.” “But I thought you weren’t ready?” “Jack, I’ll never be ready like this. I realised this when you were talking. I’ll keep saying that all my life, just as how I kept saying I’m not ready to have friends, to trust anyone except myself and my family. I wanna give this a chance. And there is no one better in this world than you. No one more I trust than–” I couldn’t stop myself. I reached up to her, cupped her face, and tilting slightly, pressed my lips against her, softly. I heard her gasp slightly, surprised. I pressed on just a little. I felt her lip smiling, foreheads touching. She held my face, tracing her fingers over my face, as if I was the book that held the secret to her universe. She pressed her lips deeper, kissing back more fiercely. She ran her fingers through my hair. Dimly it registered in my mind that we were in the cafeteria,and this was highly inappropriate. But I didn’t care. All that mattered now was Ruchi. Her cheeks in my palm, her breath mingled in mine, her scent, overpowering me, her lips, on mine.

After when time started moving again, we were both gasping for air. “Were you holding in you’re breath too?” She laughed. “It was nice. I hope we could do that more often.” “The kissing part or the holding our breath? Besides, I think it’s time to leave, before we get into any trouble” “Oh right, I almost forgot we were in cafeteria!” “How could you remember? You were too busy thinking about me” Ruchi punched me. “Yeah, right, let’s go. My mom loves you, but I don’t think she’ll approve you keeping me for this late!”

We were walking to her home. I was still in a dream. Did Ruchi just say yess to me? TO ME? But here she was singing a song, walking along, one hand on my arm. She folded her stick, as she no longer needed it when she is with me. I hope I don’t let her down. “Woah there!” I grabbed her arm. “Wait, we gotta cross this street.” She turned her head. But there is no car near.” “wait, I can see one. let it pass.” I wrapped my arm around her shoulder. She turned to give me a smile, then turned, trying to catch sound of the car.

“You don’t know how much I wanted to say this Ruchi. But I love you.” “She smiled again. “Stop it!” she said. “Why? why can’t I profess my undying love for the best girl in the world?” “Wow, if I knew you were this cheesy, I’d never have talked to you.” she leaned in and sniffed. “Yup, you even smell of cheese. Yuck!” “Yeah right, get used to it babe.” “Did you just call me babe?” she looked up surprised. I squeezed her shoulder slightly. “I guess I did, babe” “Don’t you think you’re taking this too fast?” “I’m a Maserati” “Cheesy!” she said, faux fanning her face. “Jack, seriously, next year we’ll go to college. And I don’t think we’ll be in the same college. What about then?” “Lemme see” I paused

 “The sun will rise in the east. Gravity will attract every body to itself. Apple will be releasing slimmer iPhones. Corporate businesses will continue to deny climate change.” “Yes but what about you? You might meet some girl and” “And you might meet some guy. Look Ruchi” I raised her chin. “It won’t matter. I’ll still love you. No matter what. I promise!” “And after college?” “I’ll get my dream job. I’ll be financially stable. And then,” “Meet my father?” I laughed. “Something like that. Look Ruchi, I’m with you okay? Till the end. I can promise all I want, but it’ll be better is I show you. One day Ruchi. Till then, lets just enjoy while we have each other near” “Promise you’ll never go?” “I promise”

We were almost at her door now “I’ll pick you up at 7:30 tomorrow then Ruchi?” “I’m gonna have to tell them about this Jack.” “are you sure?” “I must Jack. they sacrificed so much for me. I can’t– I have to. They will want to talk to you. Come at 7 okay?” “Look Ruchi, it’s your choice. I will be here tommorow at 7. I hope everything goes okay. Goodluck.” “I don’t need luck. I have you.” “Ohh who is being cheesy now?” “It must be rubbing off from you. Get away!” She shoved me. “Goodnight Jack!” she said, as she took out her stick, and walked towards her home. “Goodnight Ruchi!” I said. I stood there watching her go in. Her father opened the door. She waved back. As soon as she went in, I left. Tomorrow is going to be long day. Her parents, school, everything. Gods really hope I don’t let her down.